I made my Face book name Benefits, so when you add me now it says you’re friends with benefits.

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I made my Face book name Benefits, so when you add me now it says you’re friends with benefits.

-- Anonymous

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Different but best friends.

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My wife is going to kill me. But you look like my wife, so that’s OK!

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I’m not short, I’m compact and ridiculously adorable.

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I do all of my ironing in the dryer.

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Don’t worry, better days are coming. They are called Friday, Saturday and Sunday.

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