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Didn’t Selfie Sticks used to be called Friends?
-- Anonymous
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What’s another word for Thesaurus?
-- Steven Wright
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Always remember: When SHE cancels a date, it is because.. She has to. But When HE cancels a date, it is because.. He has two.
-- Anonymous
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Everyone should have kids. They are the greatest joy in the world. But they are also terrorists. You’ll realize this as soon as they are born and start using sleep deprivation to torture you.
-- Ray Romano
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My psychiatrist told me I was crazy and I said I want a second opinion. He said okay, you’re ugly too. – Rodney Dangerfield
-- Ayshu
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Happy birthday sweetie may all your dreams come true, and on this day of happiness i send my love to you.
-- Anonymous
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