The only reason I’m fat is because a tiny body couldn’t store all this personality.

Quotern

The only reason I’m fat is because a tiny body couldn’t store all this personality.

-- Anonymous

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No relationship is all sunshine, but two people can share one umbrella and survive the storm together.

-- Anonymous

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What I tell a girl is, your six-pack hot boyfriend right now, in six years, will be balding and maybe have a paunch. But I make you laugh every five minutes today, and I’ll make you laugh 20 years from now; that’s not going to go away.

-- Vir Das

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The lessons of life are free, but they cost a lot.

-- Anonymous

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I would like to apologize to anyone. I have not yet offended. Please be patient. I will get back to you shortly.

-- Anonymous

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Happy Birthday! Isn’t it? Wait, let me just confirm it on Facebook.

-- Anonymous

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