I’m in desperate need of a 6 month vacation…twice a year.

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I’m in desperate need of a 6 month vacation…twice a year.

-- Anonymous

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Today one of your secret is going to be revealed. So, get ready for the blast. Happy birthday.

-- Ayshu

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I’m not shy, I’m holding back my awesomeness so I don’t intimidate you.

-- Anonymous

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Success is like dealing with your kid or teaching your wife to drive. Sooner or later you’ll end up in the police station.

-- Fred Allen

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When life gives you lemons, squirt someone in the eye.

-- Cathy Guisewite

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Never trust people who smile constantly. They’re either selling something or not very bright.

-- Anonymous

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