I love you more than coffee. But please don’t make me prove it.

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I love you more than coffee. But please don’t make me prove it.

-- Anonymous

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I’m a sweet lil Girl, but if you make me mad, remember I always have a pocketful of crazy waiting to come out!!

-- Ayshu

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Happy Birthday! Go ahead – snuff out the candles. I have the fire department on speed dial.

-- Ayshu

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I love you girls. Y’know, somewhere out there are four terrible fathers I wish I could thank for this great night!

-- Ted (2012)

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No matter what happens in the kitchen, never apologize.

-- Anonymous

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It’s almost bed time, so I’ll just check my e-mail, Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, and watch a season of my favorite show on Netflix real quick.

-- Anonymous

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