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The advantage of having only one child is that you always know who did it.
-- Erma Bombeck
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If a man watches three football games in a row, he should be declared legally dead.
-- Erma Bombeck
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A grandmother pretends she doesn’t know who you are on Halloween.  –
-- Erma Bombeck
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I loved you enough to let you stumble, fall, hurt, and fail.
-- Erma Bombeck
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Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died.
-- Erma Bombeck
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