What a kid I got, I told him about the birds and the bees and he told me about the butcher and my wife.

Quotern

What a kid I got, I told him about the birds and the bees and he told me about the butcher and my wife.

-- Anonymous

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It’s a recession when your neighbor loses his job; it’s a depression when you lose yours. – Harry S. Truman

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I came from a real tough neighborhood. Once a guy pulled a knife on me. I knew he wasn’t a professional, the knife had butter on it.

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Happiness is having friends who are idiots ?

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Everyday I fall in love with you more and more. Except yesterday, yesterday you were pretty annoying.

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Everything I buy is vintage and smells funny. Maybe that’s why I don’t have a boyfriend.

-- Lucy Liu

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