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A balanced diet means a cupcake in each hand.
-- Anonymous
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It’s amazing that the amount of news that happens in the world every day always just exactly fits the newspaper.
-- Jerry Seinfeld
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Grandpa Patterson used to say: Never approach a bull from the front, a horse from the rear or a fool from any direction.
-- Debbie Macomber
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My psychiatrist told me I was crazy and I said I want a second opinion. He said okay, you’re ugly too. – Rodney Dangerfield
-- Ayshu
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Sorry I can’t go to work tomorrow, I fractured my motivation.
-- Anonymous
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Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool.
-- Vijayaraj
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