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I ran a half marathon sounds so much better than I quit halfway through a marathon
-- Anonymous
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Happy Birthday my dearest Cousin. May you live to be so old that your driving terrifies people.
-- Anonymous
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Mornings were made for sleeping, wild sex, and bacon.
-- Anonymous
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Good marriage is like good wine, it gets better with age.
-- Anonymous
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A girl can survive without a boyfriend, but she can’t survive without a best friend.
-- Ayshu
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No woman really wants a man to carry her off; she only wants him to want to do it.
-- Elizabeth Peters
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