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Men are from Earth, women are from Earth. Deal with it.
-- George Carlin
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Weather forecast for tonight: dark.
-- George Carlin
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Let a smile be your umbrella, and you’ll end up with a face full of rain.
-- George Carlin
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If the black box flight recorder is never damaged during a plane crash, why isn’t the whole airplane made out of that stuff?
-- George Carlin
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There are nights when the wolves are silent and only the moon howls.
-- George Carlin
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