You get older every year, but I don’t want to remember that. Just enjoy and don’t eat my portion of cake.

Quotern

You get older every year, but I don’t want to remember that. Just enjoy and don’t eat my portion of cake.

-- Anonymous

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Oh, and this one time, at band camp, I stuck a flute in my pussy…

-- Anonymous

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Never trust people who smile constantly. They’re either selling something or not very bright.

-- Anonymous

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We all have that one friend that we can’t put on speakerphone because we don’t know what’s going to come out of their mouth.

-- Vijayaraj

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Happy Birthday. The sky’s the limit for an incredible cousin like you. I hope you have the most memorable celebration ever!

-- Ayshu

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It takes a lot of courage for a man to admit his wife is wrong…

-- Anonymous

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