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I’m a girl. Don’t touch my hair, face, phone, or boyfriend.
-- Anonymous
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People always ask me, ‘Were you funny as a child?’ Well, no, I was an accountant.
-- Ellen DeGeneres
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Online by public demand
-- Anonymous
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I’m very proud of my gold pocket watch. My grandfather, on his deathbed, sold me this watch.  –
-- Woody Allen
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You are what you do. If you do boring, stupid, monotonous work, chances \u2028are you’ll end up boring, stupid, and monotonous.
-- Anonymous
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Life is pain. Anyone who says otherwise is selling something.
-- William Goldman
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