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I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.
-- Groucho Marx
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Only one man in a thousand is a leader of men – the other 999 follow women.
-- Groucho Marx
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If you find it hard to laugh at yourself, I would be happy to do it for you.
-- Groucho Marx
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Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife.
-- Groucho Marx
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I’m leaving because the weather is too good. I hate London when it’s not raining.
-- Groucho Marx
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