Despite the contradictory advice circulated in the late ’90s, if you want to be my lover, please do not get with my friends.

Quotern

Despite the contradictory advice circulated in the late ’90s, if you want to be my lover, please do not get with my friends.

-- Anonymous

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When in doubt, wear red lipstick

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Oh, your another birthday has arrived? But it really seems only yesterday that you were a whole year younger! God bless you dear!

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If you don’t believe in ghosts, you’ve never been to a family reunion.

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Cooking is like snow skiing: If you don’t fall at least 10 times, then you’re not skiing hard enough.

-- Ayshu

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