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The only exercise I’ve done this month is running out of money
-- Anonymous
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A woman saying I’m not mad at you is like a dentist saying You won’t feel a thing.
-- Anonymous
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Wine is bottled poetry. –
-- Erin Morgenstern
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You get older every year, but I don’t want to remember that. Just enjoy and don’t eat my portion of cake.
-- Anonymous
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I wish your birthday was on the weekend every year, so I can celebrate all weekend.
-- Ayshu
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When you mess up a guy's hair, he thinks it's cute, but when you mess up a girl's hair, just hope you're wearing something bulletproof.
-- Anonymous
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