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I can only please one person a day. Today isn’t your day. Tomorrow doesn’t look good either.
-- Anonymous
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Happy Birthday! Go ahead – snuff out the candles. I have the fire department on speed dial.
-- Ayshu
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A grandfather makes us laugh, makes us feel safe, and always makes us feel loved. –
-- Kate Summers
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What’s another word for Thesaurus?
-- Steven Wright
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Always be nice to your children because they are the ones who will choose your rest home.
-- Phyllis Diller
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I am not a vegetarian because I love animals. I am a vegetarian because I hate plants.
-- Ayshu
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