If you think nobody cares about you, try missing a couple of payments.

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If you think nobody cares about you, try missing a couple of payments.

-- Steven Wright

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You can’t have everything. Where would you put it?

-- Steven Wright

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I saw a bank that said 24 Hour Banking, but I don't have that much time.

-- Steven Wright

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I was reading the dictionary. I thought it was a poem about everything.

-- Steven Wright

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Why is a carrot more orange than an orange?

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I’m addicted to placebos.

-- Steven Wright

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