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Why is a carrot more orange than an orange?
-- Steven Wright
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What’s another word for Thesaurus?
-- Steven Wright
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If you think nobody cares about you, try missing a couple of payments.
-- Steven Wright
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I’m addicted to placebos.
-- Steven Wright
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I'm writing an unauthorized autobiography.
-- Steven Wright
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I’m writing a book. I’ve got the page numbers done.
-- Steven Wright
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