The beautiful part about killing someone with an icicle is the murder weapon melts and then evaporates. And your assassination can be fruit flavored!?

Quotern

The beautiful part about killing someone with an icicle is the murder weapon melts and then evaporates. And your assassination can be fruit flavored!?

-- Jarod Kintz

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I gathered all my eggs in one basket, because I believe in collectivism, and I wanted a tyrannical omelet.?

-- Jarod Kintz

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Love is a bicycle with two pancakes for wheels. You may see love as more of an exercise in hard work, but I see it as more of a breakfast on the go.

-- Jarod Kintz

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I want to write my own eulogy, and I want to write it in Latin. It seems only fitting to read a dead language at my funeral.

-- Jarod Kintz

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Half of what I write is garbage, but if I don't write it down it decomposes in my head.

-- Jarod Kintz

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