My wife a great driver, she once hit a deer. It was in a zoo. There are a pair of shoes on the dashboard. they belong to the last guy she hit

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My wife a great driver, she once hit a deer. It was in a zoo. There are a pair of shoes on the dashboard. they belong to the last guy she hit

-- Rodney Dangerfield

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I came from a real tough neighborhood. Once a guy pulled a knife on me. I knew he wasn't a professional, the knife had butter on it.

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One year they asked me to be poster boy for birth control.

-- Rodney Dangerfield

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I came from a real tough neighborhood. In the local restaurant I sat down and had broken leg of lamb.

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Last week I was walking by a cemetery, two guys came after me with shovels. It was all about money.

-- Rodney Dangerfield

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My wife has to be the worst cook. In my house, we pray after we eat.

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