He found a new way to cover up his bad breath. He holds up his arms.

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He found a new way to cover up his bad breath. He holds up his arms.

-- Rodney Dangerfield

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I came from a real tough neighborhood. Once a guy pulled a knife on me. I knew he wasn't a professional, the knife had butter on it.

-- Rodney Dangerfield

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She looked at my calendar and wanted to know who JUNE was.

-- Rodney Dangerfield

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My wife has to be the worst cook. In my house, we pray after we eat.

-- Rodney Dangerfield

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For Christmas one year I bought my son a BB gun. He bought me a tshirt with a bulls eye on the back.

-- Rodney Dangerfield

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